#i don't have my hard copy of ntlis it seems on me to give a page number but it's in the paramour chapter so not too hard to find

[raytorosaurus]

i don't believe i've ever seen the clip of ray apologizing to mikey for the perfectionism while writing thing, would you happen to know what interview it's from? <3

yeah sure! it was tom bryant, who'd known the band a long time, interviewing them in 2011 for a ten-year retrospective (rebloggable here). they talked about tough times in the band's history, especially how they all lost their minds in the paramour - gerard and ray in particular got deeply obsessive about the album. even then, based on every interview i've seen, that was the height of the interpersonal tension between the four of them over the whole ten years. and they all openly acknowledged it and apologised and moved on...literally the least messy emo band ever 😭

this is the relevant part but the whole interview's a good read:

then tom bryant went into more detail on it in one of the tougher sections of not the life it seems to read:

and then talks about the immediate aftermath, which led to flw, which saved the album:

bryant's biography is definitely a little sensationalised or biased at times but honestly not as much as it could easily have been imo, and i like that he pointed out how brave of ray it was to make that apology so plainly. that was definitely one of the things that really drew me to ray early on - you can beat yourself up or put yourself down in a self-deprecating way over your flaws and mistakes or you can acknowledge them and consciously decide not to repeat them. and the second one isn't an easy thing to do so it's something i respect so much about him :')